A Christmas Tree--the Perfect Gift For A

Homeland Security Chief Tom Ridge Raised Security Alert To A Code Red. Apparently Howard Dean Has Escaped. Did You See Dean's Crazed Speech The Other Night, Yelling? I See Why His Wife Won't Campaign With Him. In Fact, Dean Has A New Slogan: 'aaghhhh.'

Soup Is Probably A Way Associated With Screwing You Outside Of A Meal.

President Obama Will Be Going To Disney World Where He'll Unveil His New Plan To Create Jobs. And What Better Place For The President To Talk About His Jobs Plan Than Fantasyland?

And Ralph Nader, God Bless Him, Still Out There Campaigning. Ralph Nader Said Today He Has Set A Record For The Most Campaign Speeches Given In One Day. He Gave 21 Speeches In One Day. Of Course, We Have To Take His Word For It, Because Of Course, There Are No Witnesses.

President-elect Barack Obama Is Starting To Get An Idea Of Just How Hard His New Job Is Going To Be. Today, He Said He Wanted To Bring A Sense Of Accountability To Washington. I Think They Realized Actual Accountability, Never Going To Happen.