A Certain Nervous Disorder Afflicting The Young

Occident: The Part Of The World Lying West (or East) Of The Orient. It Is Largely Inhabited By Christians, A Powerful Subtribe Of The Hypocrites, Whose Principal Industries Are Murder And Cheating, Which They Are Pleased To Call War And Commerce. These, Also, Are The Principal Industries Of The Orient.

Reading, N. The General Body Of What One Reads. In Our Country It Consists, As A Rule, Of Indiana Novels, Short Stories In "dialect" And Humor In Slang.

Universalist, N. One Who Forgoes The Advantage Of A Hell For Persons Of Another Faith.

Year: A Period Of Three Hundred And Sixty-five Disappointments.

Optimism, N. The Doctrine, Or Belief, That Everything Is Beautiful, Including What Is Ugly, Everything Good, Especially The Bad, And Everything Right That Is Wrong. It Is Held With Greatest Tenacity By Those Most Accustomed To The Mischance Of Falling Into Adversity, And Is Most Acceptably Expounded With Disproof - An Intellectual Disorder, Yielding To No Treatment But Death. It Is Hereditary, But Fortunately Not Contagious.