You See The Pictures In The Paper

I'm A Staunch Independant. Every Time I Think I Am A Republican, They Do Something Greedy, And Every Time I Think I Am A Democrat, They Go And Do Someting Stupid.

French Troops Arrived In Afghanistan Last Week, And Not A Minute Too Soon. The French Are Acting As Advisers To The Taliban, To Teach Them How To Surrender Properly.

Governor Gray Davis Has Asked The California State Supreme Court To Delay The October Recall Vote Because He Says That's Not Enough Time To Put On A Fair Election. Hey, Let Me Tell You Something. If We Didn't Need A Fair Election To Pick The President Of The United States, We Don't Need A Fair Election To Pick The Governor Of California.

In Huntington Beach, California, Three Police Instructors Lost Their Jobs After Ordering Two Cadets Who Were Caught Smoking To Eat Cigarette Sandwiches As Punishment. And Of Course The Tobacco Companies Are Thinking, 'cigarette Sandwiches - What A Great Idea.'

President Clinton Says He Looks Forward To The Day A Citizen Can Call The Irs And Get The Right Answer To A Question. I Look Forward To The Day I Can Call The Irs And Get A Voice That Says, 'sorry, That Number Has Been Disconnected.'