You Know You Are Getting Old When

Our Financial Ills Will Never Be Settled Till You Fix It So Every Man Will Pay An Income Tax On What He Earns, Be It A Farm, Grocery Store Or Municipal Or Government Bonds.

In Hollywood The Woods Are Full Of People That Learned To Write But Evidently Can't Read. If They Could Read Their Stuff, They'd Stop Writing.

Heroing Is One Of The Shortest-lived Professions There Is.

When I Die, My Epitaph Or Whatever You Call Those Signs On Gravestones Is Going To Read: "i Joked About Every Prominent Man Of My Time, But I Never Met A Man I Didn't Like."

There's A Simple Solution To Our Traffic Problems. We'll Have Business Build The Roads, And Government Build The Cars.