You Can't Retrieve You Life (unless You're

And So, Thanksgiving. Its The Most Amazing Holiday. Just Think About It — It's A Miracle That Once A Year So Many Millions Of Americans Sit Down To Exactly The Same Meal As One Another, Exactly The Same Meal They Grew Up Eating, And Exactly The Same Meal They Ate A Year Earlier. The Turkey. The Sweet Potatoes. The Stuffing. The Pumpkin Pie. Is There Anything Else We All Can Agree So Vehemently About? I Don't Think So.

If You're Looking For Monogamy, You'd Better Marry A Swan.

When You Have A Baby, You Set Off An Explosion In Your Marriage, And When The Dust Settles, Your Marriage Is Different From What It Was. Not Better, Necessarily; Not Worse, Necessarily; But Different.

Too Few Journalists Become Screenwriters. I Say To All The Would-be Screenwriters: Become Journalists. And I’ll Say To Working Journalists: Do Not Stay Journalists. Become Screenwriters.

Vera Said: 'why Do You Feel You Have To Turn Everything Into A Story?' So I Told Her Why: Because If I Tell The Story, I Control The Version. Because If I Tell The Story, I Can Make You Laugh, And I Would Rather Have You Laugh At Me Than Feel Sorry For Me. Because If I Tell The Story, It Doesn't Hurt As Much. Because If I Tell The Story, I Can Get On With It.