You Can Behead People, You Can Crucify

Scientists Say An 8.9 Earthquake Here Could Knock Down Buildings, Flood Coastal Areas... And Improve The Roads.

If A President Must Constantly Remind The People That We're At War, Then We're Not.

Stop Saying Athletes Do It For The Love Of The Game. They Do It For The Love Of Their 32-room Mansion With The Live Shark Tank In The Living Room. If Pro Sports Paid Minimum Wage, Shaquille O'neal Would Be A Bouncer At Scores, And Anna Kournikova Would Be A Mail-order Bride From Minsk.

Obama Is Huge In The Polls These Days. His Popularity Is Soaring. Even Conservatives Are Coming Around. 30 Percent Of Them Now Believe Obama Deserves A Green Card.

The Idea That Men Are From Mars And Women Are From Venus Is A Bunch Of Bullshit. Treat Her Like You Would A Friend, And You'll Wind Up With A Lover.