Yawns Are Hard To Refute.

People Are Reluctant To Cite Boredom As Grounds For Divorce.

Boredom And Fear Keep Us Working And Obeying The Laws.

Wit Saves Us From Being Swallowed Whole By Life.

I Am Forbidden Sugar, Fat, And Alcohol. So Hooray, I Guess, For Oatmeal, Lemon Juice, And Chicken Soup.

Never Invite To Dinner: Those Who Won't Decide Until The Last Minute; Those Who Come More Than Half An Hour Late; Those Who Want To Bring Along Two Or Three Friends; Drunks; Monologists; Those Who Stay Until Three O'clock In The Morning; Those Who Think That Conversation Means Having An Argument; Those Who Take A High Moral Tone; Those Who Are Stupid, Ugly, Or Dull. Enforcement Of These Rules Will Enable One To Eat Alone Every Night In Comfort.