When They're Born Outside, Crows Come And

After The Trial, I Watched As Another Female Pathologist Collected Maggots From A Spinal Column Found In The Desert. There Was A Decomposed Head, Too, And Before Leaving Work She Planned To Simmer It And Study The Exposed Cranium For Contusions. I Was Asked To Pass This Information Along To The Chief Medical Examiner, And, Looking Back, I Perhaps Should Have Chosen My Words More Carefully. 'fire Up The Kettle,' I Told Him. 'ol'-fashioned Skull Boil At Five P.m.

But I'm A Humorist. I'm Not A Reporter, I Never Pretended To Be A Reporter.

The Things I've Bought From Strangers In The Dark Would Curl Your Hair.

It's Hard To Love A Place That's Outlawed Smoking But Finds It Perfectly Acceptable To Serve Raw Fish In A Bath Of Chocolate.

I've Wasted A Lot Of Time Pretending To Be Interested In People Who Weren't Terribly Interesting.