When I Went From Girl Body To

The Time I'm Not Spending With My Kid Has To Be Worth It.

I Was On A Tv Show When I Was 13, And I Had A Tutor For High School. Everyone Was Like "oh, You're Missing Out On The High School Experience," So I'd Go With My Cousins To Parties Where There Would Be A Keg And People Doing Body Shots And Playing Quarters. I Was Like, What A Waste Of Time. I Didn't Want To Be Doing E [ecstasy] And Making Out With A Guy Three Years Older Than Me Who's A Loser.

There's A Lot Of Pressure On Women To Fulfill Certain Fantasies. They Expect You To Be A Little Bit Of A Tart, To Flirt With All The Men. A Lot Of Women Do It. But I'm Not Doing That. I Talk With These Guys About Their Wives And Kids Right Away. When They Say Inappropriate Things, I Let Them, Because Boys Will Be Boys, But I'm Not Looking To Participate In Their Conversations.

I Guess For Me, Balance Isn't About Treating Your Time Like A Pie Chart And Dividing It Into Equally Sized Slices For You, The Kids, Work, And So On. It's About The Quality Of How You Spend Your Time, Not The Quantity--are You Being Present And Focused On Whatever You're Doing While You're Doing It? I Truly Believe That's How You Can Be The Best Version Of Yourself, Whether You're In Work Mode, Mom Mode, Or Wife Mode. When I Know I'm Giving My Undivided Attention In Each Of These Areas, I Don't Feel So Guilty About The Time Spent Away From Them.

I Think The World Is Ready For People Of Color To Take On More Heroic And Leading Roles, And Not Always Be The Sidekick, The Nemesis Or Any Sort Of Stereotype Of What A Person Of Color Can Play Typically In A Hollywood Picture.