When I Used To Do The Edinburgh

Am I Allowed To Call Myself Working-class Now? Because Obviously I'm Now Very Rich.

I'm Always Amazed To Hear Of Air Crash Victims So Badly Mutilated That They Have To Be Identified By Their Dental Records. What I Can't Understand Is, If They Don't Know Who You Are, How Do They Know Who Your Dentist Is?

I Really Don't Take Any Interest At All In Contemporary Comedy.

On My First Day In New York A Guy Asked Me If I Knew Where Central Park Was. When I Told Him I Didn't, He Said: Do You Mind If I Mug You Here?

If You Became A Comedian In The '80s, You Had To Work The Circuit And Make People Laugh. Canned Laughter Is Cheating.