When I Planned My Wedding The First

When I First Started Wearing Wigs, I Didn't Know You Had To Anchor Them Down With Bobby Pins. I Walked Out During A Windy Day And My Wig Blew Off And Got Stuck To A Branch. I Was Walking While My Wig Was Hanging! If That's Not The Most Embarrassing Thing... But You Have To Use Bobby Pins.

With Me Being In So Many Pain From When You Have A Betrayal From Your Best Friend - Who Was My Husband - And The Girl Got Pregnant, I Couldn't Even Get Out Of Bed. The Only Thing That Saved Me Was My Stand-up. I Would Get On Stage And Just Talk About Stuff, And I Made People Laugh. A Lot Of Women E-mail Me And Say, 'how Do You Smile? How Do You Laugh At Something Like This?' That's How I Do It. I Laugh Because That's How I Get Through Pain.

My Husband, Sal, And I Put Date Nights On The Calendar Once A Week. I Know That Doesn't Sound Romantic, But Otherwise It Won't Get Done.

My Mom Passed Away At 41 From Diabetes. And I'm 42, Thank You. I Didn't Want To Do That To My Son. So Any Time I Was At The Gym, That Thing That Helped Me Do That Last Squat Was My Son Calling Some Other Woman Mommy. And That Would Just Give Me That Extra Oomph To Do That Last Squat. I Want To Be Around For Him.

I Don't Think Anything Predated Christians.