When I Jumped Off A Roof In

Sex To Save The Friendship? Well If We Have To We Have To.

If You Go To A Bad Movie, It's Two Hours. If You're In A Bad Movie, It's Two Years.

So Let Me Get This Straight. You Find Yourself In The Kitchen. You See An éclair In The Receptacle... And You Think To Yourself: "what The Hell, I'll Just Eat Some Trash."

The Best Piece Of Advice I Received Before I Got Married Was, "be Careful What You Say When You're In A Fight, Because It Could Stick In Someone's Head." I Don't Think I've Ever Said Anything I Really Regretted. I'm Very Sympathetic To Women. I've Really Studied Wife-ology, And I Know You've Got To Figure Out The Feelings. Deal With The Feelings.

I Like Staying In Hotels. I Like Their Tiny Soap. I Like To Pretend It's Regular-sized And My Muscles Are Huge.