When I Am At Rodeo I Find

It Is A Little Ironic That One Thing A Babysitter Should Not Do Is Sit On A Baby.

If I Have To Move Up In A Building, I Choose The Elevator Over The Escalator. Because One Time I Was Riding The Escalator And I Tripped. I Fell Down The Stairs For An Hour And A Half.

Here Is A Tip For All You Young People Drinking Wine. With Pasta, Drink White Wine. With Steak, Drink Red Wine. And If You're Vegan, You're Annoying.

I Don't Usually Fly In First Class, But I Fart In First Class.

I Would Like To Have Windshield Wipers That Do The Whole Windshield, Please.