What Does Karl Marx Put On His

Can't Wait For Tomorrow When I Get To Exercise My Patriotic Duty As An American: Complaining About How Long It's Taking To Vote.

Remember, Jesus Would Rather Constantly Shame Gays Than Let Orphans Have A Family.

My Guest Newt Gingrich Shut Down The Government During The Clinton Administration. I'll Ask Him When It's Gonna Start Working Again.

President Bush Has Embarked On An Eight-day Tour Of The Continent. He Hopes This One Goes Better Than The Other Ones He's Made Recently. Obviously He's Not Doing That Well In North America [on Screen: '36% Approval'], His South American Trip Had A Few Bumps [on Screen: 'angry Mobs Of Torch-carrying Bumps'], Europe Seems To Think The President Doesn't Care What They Think, But Hey, Who Cares What They Think? They Could At Least Thank Him For What He's Done For Their Burning Effigy Industry.

Cameras Are Dangerous. With No Waiting Period Or Background Check, Any Whack-job Could Just Stroll Into A Wal-mart And Walk Out With A Semi-automatic. Now, For Years I've Been Pressing For Stricter Regulations On Cameras, Especially Around Our Elected Officials. Too Many Political Lives Have Been Cut Short By Some Crazed Shooter.