To Have Created A Welfare State Was

You Can Keep A Dog: But It Is The Cat Who Keeps People, Because Cats Find Humans Useful Domestic Animals.

Nobody Uses His Car In New York, Because So Many People Use It That Traffic Is Congested And Unbearably Slow.

Television Is Of Great Educational Value. It Teaches You While Still Young How To (a) Kill, (b) Rob, (c) Embezzle, (d) Shoot, (e) Poison, And, Generally Speaking, (f) How To Grow Up Into A Wild West Outlaw Or Gangster By The Time You Leave School.

Jokes Are Better Than War. Even The Most Aggressive Jokes Are Better Than The Least Aggressive Wars. Even The Longest Jokes Are Better Than The Shortest Wars.

Humility Is One Of The Most Repulsive Virtues, Nearly Always False.