The Worst Thing About Living In This

I Feel Bad For People Who Have Never Been Addicted To Anything, Because They're The Real Losers. You Want To Know Why? Because They Don't Know What It's Like To Really Want Something - And Then Get It Again And Again And Again.

I'm Just Looking For Authentic Engagement Of Some Kind, And Usually, After An Hour Or More, You Get That. Some People Talk At You. Some People Just Want To Answer Questions, But A Lot Of Times, All Of A Sudden You Drift Away, And You Don't Remember You're On The Mic, And You're In Something Real.

I've Had This Look For About A Year. I Usually Grow This Beard Out Around Christmas. I Like To Go To Malls Dressed As Jesus, And I Like To Then Walk Around The Mall And Go, 'no! No! This Wasn't What It Was Supposed To Be About, People!' Then If There's A Santa At The Mall, I Walk Up To Him And Say, 'listen, Fat Man, You're Just A Clown At My Birthday Party.'

It May Have Lost Its Special-ness Forever And The Clubs Might Not Being Doing Well But I Think Standup Is In The Best Shape It Has Been In A Long Time.

Jokes Do Finish Themselves. I Really Do See Them As Ongoing Conversations About Personal Themes That I Ruminate On.