The Trouble With The Dictionary Is That

Etiquette Means Behaving Yourself A Little Better Than Is Absolutely Essential.

If A Cat Does Something, We Call It Instinct; If We Do The Same Thing, For The Same Reason, We Call It Intelligence.

Humor Springs From Rage, Hay Fever, Overdue Rent And Miscellaneous Hell.

[footnote:] Pliny The Elder Described A Whale Called "balaena Or Whirlpool, Which Is So Long And Broad As To Take Up More In Length And Breadth Than Two Acres Of Ground." This Brings Up Again The Old Question: Are The Classics Doomed? Our Ancestors Believed That Four Years Of This Sort Of Information Would Inevitably Produce A President, Or At Least A Cabinet Member. It Didn't Seem To Work Out That Way.

Orangutans Teach Us That Looks Are Not Everything-but Warned Near It.