The Only Qualifications For A Lineman Are

You Know, I've Been Attending So Many Banquets That I Know What They're Going To Serve Before I Get There.

Winning To Often Is As Disastrous As Losing Too Often. Both Get The Same Results, The Falling Off Of The Public's Enthusiasm.

If The Coach Insists Upon Hard Play, But Clean Play, The Team Will Do Likewise.

One Loss Is Good For The Soul, Too Many Losses Is Not Good For The Coach.

The Only Qualifications For A Lineman Are To Be Big And Dumb. To Be A Back, You Only Have To Be Dumb.