The Old Chinese Proverb Springs To Mind

Failed Relationships Can Be Described As So Much Wasted Make-up.

I Rang My Mother To Thank Her For Giving Birth To Me And She Said, "what Choice Had I? You Were In There, How Else Were You Going To Get Out?

Medically Speaking, There Is No Such Thing As A Nervous Breakdown. Which Is Very Annoying To Discover When You're Right In The Middle Of One.

Hen Nights Should Be Banned. You're Honour-bound To Behave Atrociously, Then Feel Terribly Ashamed Afterwards. (this Charming Man)

They Say The Path Of True Love Never Runs Smooth. Well, Luke And My True Love's Path Didn't Run At All, It Limped Along In New Boots That Were Chafing Its Heels. Blistered And Cut, Red And Raw, Every Hopping, Lopsided Step, A Little Slice Of Agony.