The Last Birthday That's Any Good Is

I Know A Lot Of You Believe That Most People In The News Business Are Liberal. Let Me Tell You, I Know A Lot Of Them, And They Were Almost Evenly Divided This Time. Half Of Them Liked Senator Kerry; The Other Half Hated President Bush.

The World Must Be Filled With Unsuccessful Musical Careers Like Mine, And It's Probably A Good Thing. We Don't Need A Lot Of Bad Musicians Filling The Air With Unnecessary Sounds. Some Of The Professionals Are Bad Enough.

The Federal Government Has Sponsored Research That Has Produced A Tomato That Is Perfect In Every Respect, Except That You Can't Eat It. We Should Make Every Effort To Make Sure This Disease, Often Referred To As 'progress', Doesn't Spread.

Vegetarian: Indian Word For Lousy Hunter.

I Try To Look Nice. I Comb My Hair, I Tie My Tie, I Put On A Jacket, But I Draw The Line When It Comes To Trimming My Eyebrows. You Work With What You Got.