The Female Nudity In Movies Is Always

My Dad Was A Bedwetter; I Think His Dad Was A Bedwetter. I Like To Talk About It Because It's Something That I Thought Would Be My Deepest, Darkest Secret My Whole Life, And Then You Become An Adult, And It's Not.

Since So Many People These Days Don't Seem To Start Their Families Until Around Age Forty, I Predict There Will Be Less Child Beating, But More Slipped Disks From Lifting Babies Out Of Cribs. Even The Father Of Advanced Age Who's Not Inclined To Spare The Rod Is Likely To Suffer More Than His Victim: The First Punch He Throws Might Well Be The Last Straw For His Rotator Cuff, Reducing His Disciplinary Options To Mere Verbal Abuse And Napping.

Jesus Is Magic, Because He Turned Water Into Wine. I Think He Made The Statue Of Liberty Disappear In The 80s Or Something.

I Feel So Confident And Awesome And Sexy When I'm With People Who Are Older Than Me, And I've Always Been Surrounded By People Who Are Older Than Me. But To Be Vital In Comedy, You Have To Exist In A World That's Dominated By Young People.

Mommy Is One Of The Chosen People … And Daddy Believes That Jesus Is Magic!