The Divorce Has Lasted Way Longer Than

Marriages Come And Go, But Divorce Is Forever.

Oh, How I Regret Not Having Worn A Bikini For The Entire Year I Was Twenty-six. If Anyone Young Is Reading This, Go, Right This Minute, Put On A Bikini, And Don't Take It Off Until You're Thirty-four.

I Look As Young As A Person Can Look Given How Old I Am.

Reading Is Escape, And The Opposite Of Escape.

If Pregnancy Were A Book, They Would Cut The Last Two Chapters. The Beginning Is Glorious, Especially If You're Lucky Enough Not To Have Morning Sickness And If, Like Me, You've Had Small Breasts All Your Life. Suddenly They Begin To Grow, And You've Got Them, You've Really Got Them, Breasts, Darling Breasts, And When You Walk Down The Street They Bounce, Truly They Do, They Bounce Bounce Bounce.