Take A Person’s Memories, And You Change

I Understand Why She Did All Those Things, But That Doesn't Mean We Aren't Still Broken.

At Home I Used To Spend Calm, Pleasant Nights With My Family. My Mother Knit Scarves For The Neighborhood Kids. My Father Helped Caleb With His Homework. There Was A Fire In The Fireplace And Peace In My Heart, As I Was Doing Exactly What I Was Supposed To Be Doing, And Everything Was Quiet. I Have Never Been Carried Around By A Large Boy, Or Laughed Until My Stomach Hurt At The Dinner Table, Or Listened To The Clamor Of A Hundred People All Talking At Once. Peace Is Restrained; This Is Free.

So How Can I Hold Tobias’s Desperation Against Him, Like I’m Better Than Him, Like I’ve Never Let My Own Brokenness Blind Me?

Maybe It's A Little Depressing To Think That My Vision Of A Perfect World Is Actually So Messed Up, But I Think It Means That I Don't Really Understand What 'perfect' Is.

Sometimes I Just... Want To See It Again. Want To See You Awake.