Strictly Speaking, The Land Does Not Exist;

All I Know Of Birds To This Date Is That Sparrows Are The Ones That Are Not Pigeons.

There Are Many Mysteries In Old Age But The Greatest, Surely, Is This: In Those Adverts For Walk-in Bathtubs, Why Doesn't All The Water Gush Out When You Get In?

Can Anything Match That First Fine Discovery Of The Telephone And All It Stood For? That First Realization That, Contained Within Ten Simple Digits, Lay The Infinitely Possible? Out There ... Lay Six Billion Ears, All The People In The World Available For Contact And Mystery And Insult, Unable To Resist The Beckoning Of One Small And Villainous Forefinger.

Having Lost The Last War, They Are Currently Enjoying A "wirtschaftswunder," Which Can Be Briefly Translated As "the Best Way To Own A Mercedes Is To Build One."

Ethnically, The Germans Are Teutonic... Being Made Up Of Vandals, Gepidae, And Goths, All Of Whom Emigrated - South From Sweden In About 500 Bc; Why They Emigrated Is Not Exactly Clear, But Many Scholars Believe It Was Because They Saw The Way Sweden Was Going, I.e. Neutral.