Somewhere In The World Is...the World's Worst

...a Young Man, Jamaican, Perhaps, His Head Circled In A Scarf With Sunbleached Dreadlocks On Piled On Top, Looking Like A Plate Of Soft-shell Crabs.

The Only Thing That Bothers Me Is If I'm In A Restaurant And I'm Eating And Someone Says, 'hey, Mind If I Smoke?' I Always Say, 'no. Mind If I Fart?

I Used To Smoke Marijuana. But I'll Tell You Something: I Would Only Smoke It In The Late Evening. Oh, Occasionally The Early Evening, But Usually The Late Evening - Or The Mid-evening. Just The Early Evening, Midevening And Late Evening. Occasionally, Early Afternoon, Early Mid-afternoon, Or Perhaps The Late-midafternoon. Oh, Sometimes The Early-mid-late-early Morning. . . But Never At Dusk!

. . . Now You See . . . They' Re Not Fit For Humans . . ." "put Them On Me.

Before You Criticize A Man, Walk A Mile In His Shoes. That Way, When You Do Criticize Him, You'll Be A Mile Away And Have His Shoes.