My Life Is Perfect Even When It's

Our Flaws Are What Makes Us Human. If We Can Accept Them As Part Of Who We Are, They Really Don't Even Have To Be An Issue.

Human Beings Only Use Ten Percent Of Their Brains. Ten Percent! Can You Imagine How Much We Could Accomplish If We Used The Other Sixty Percent?

I Admire People Who Know They Can't Sing. There Are So Many People Out There Who Can't Sing, But They Think They Can, So They Sing A Lot.

And Now I've Got To Explain The Smell That Was In There Before I Went In There. Does That Ever Happen To You? It's Not Your Fault. You've Held Your Breath, You Just Wanna Get Out, And Now You Open The Door And You Have To Explain, 'oh! Listen, There's An Odor In There And I Didn't Do It. It's Bad.

I Don't Need A Baby Growing Inside Me For Nine Months. If I'm Going To Feel Nauseous And Achy When I Wake Up, I Want To Achieve That State The Old-fashioned Way: Getting Good And Drunk The Night Before.