Prayers Without Wine Are Perfectly Pointless.

[y]ou Possess All The Attributes Of A Demagogue; A Screeching, Horrible Voice, A Perverse, Crossgrained Nature And The Language Of The Market-place. In You All Is United Which Is Needful For Governing.

It Is Bad Taste For A Poet To Be Coarse And Hairy.

If A Man Owes Me Money, I Never Seem To Forget. But If I Do The Owing, I Somehow Never Remember.

Calonice: My Dear Lysistrata, Just What Is This Matter You've Summoned Us Women To Consider.what's Up? Something Big? Lysistrata: Very Big. Calonice: (interested) Is It Stout Too? Lysistrata: (smiling) Yes, Indeed -- Both Big And Stout. Calonice: What? And The Women Still Haven't Come? Lysistrata: It's Not What You Suppose; They'd Come Soon Enough For That.

Shall I Crack Any Of Those Old Jokes, Master, At Which The Audience Never Fail To Laugh?