Performing Doesn't Turn Me On. It's An

Those Market Researchers... Are Playing Games With You And Me And With This Entire Country. Their So-called Samples Of Opinion Are No More Accurate Or Reliable Than My Grandmother's Big Toe Was When It Came To Predicting The Weather.

And For Whatever Reason I've Loved The News Since I Can Remember. I Loved It When I Was In Elementary School.

The Reelection Of Bill Clinton Is As Secure As A Double-knot Tied In Wet Rawhide.

Anyone Who Says Network News Cannot Be Profitable Doesn't Know What He Is Talking About. But Anyone Who Says It Must "always," Make Money Is Misguided And Irresponsible.

Don't Taunt The Alligator Until After You've Crossed The Creek.