Pepsi Has A New Doritos-flavored Mountain Dew.

There Was An Embarrassing Moment In The White House Earlier Today. They Were Looking Around While Searching For George Bush's Military Records. They Actually Found Some Old Al Gore Ballots.

It's Tax Season. When I Woke This Morning And Realized It Was Tax Season, I Said, My God, Didn't We Just Pay Taxes Last Year?

The Catholic Church Has A Tough New Policy On Child Molestors: Three Strikes And You're A Cardinal.

Cia Director George Tenet Has Now Testified Before The 9/11 Commission And He Said We Are Still Making The Same Dumb Mistakes, Like Leaving Memos On The President's Desk.

When I Was A Kid In Indiana, We Thought It Would Be Fun To Get A Turkey A Year Ahead Of Time And Feed It And So On For The Following Thanksgiving. But By The Time Thanksgiving Came Around, We Sort Of Thought Of The Turkey As A Pet, So We Ate The Dog. Only Kidding. It Was The Cat!