One Of The Reasons I'm So Proud

I Would Rather Spend My Entire Life Doing Nothing Than Have My Name Attached To Something Mediocre.

I've Only Recently Realized That I Have A Radically Different Relationship With My Parents Than A Lot Of People.

The Fact Is That I Write Under Duress, Often In My Bed, Often At The Last Minute. I'm Kind Of A Binge Writer I Would Say, Which I Don't Support. I Was Always Kind Of That Way. Probably The Time I Was The Most Regular As A Writer Was College. It Was Like, What Else Is There To Do When You're Living In The Midwest Studying Creative Writing?

I Always Thought That If You Had Any Real Proximity To Famous People, That Your Obsession With Famous People, Would Wane Is Some Way. Like, I Wouldn't Want To Deep Google Matthew Mcconaughey's Early Relationships For Hours Before I Go To Bed. And It's Just Gotten Worse.

My Dad Finds Twitter Just Infinitely Unrelatable. He's Like, 'why Would I Want To Tell Anybody What I Had For A Snack, It's Private?!' And I'm Like, 'why Would You Even Have A Snack If You Didn't Tell Anybody? Why Bother Eating?'