Oh My Goodness, I'm In Love With

I Do A Lot Of Stairs, A Lot Of Planks, A Lot Of Squats, A Lot Of Treadmill, A Lot Of Screaming - And I Do It Four Times A Week.

I Worked At Sears In The Woodfield Mall As A Gift Wrapper. I'm Actually A Great Gift Wrapper, And The Customers Were So Nice To Me. I Was Only 16, And Eventually Sears Put Me In Customer Service Because I Was So Friendly.

My Grandmother Taught Me That Accomplishments Meant Less Than What You Left Behind. I Started To Ask Myself What Impact My Comedy Would Have On People's Lives. And That Changed My Act. I Got Cleaner. I Stopped Talking About Generic Stuff Like Airplane Peanuts And Started Speaking The Truth About My Gift.

I Love 'the View,' So When You're Living The Dream, It's Not Work.

I Burn A Lot Of Stuff. My Son, Bless His Heart, Eats It Anyway. But He Makes A Face!