Not That I Was Ever An Asshole

The Inked Fingers And The Position Of Them, Which Is Gonna Be A 'daily Show' Photo Already, Of Them Signaling In This [nazi Salute] Manner, As If They Have Solidarity With The Iraqis Who Braved Physical Threats Against Their Lives To Vote As If Somehow These Inked-fingered Republicans Have Something To Do With That.

Until As Women We All Say, No! We Are Not Going To Starve Ourselves, Nothing Is Going To Change. We're Our Own Worse Enemies Sometimes But I Still Blame Men.

It's Not Like I Would See Anyone And Be Like, "oh Yes, That Person Looks Like Maybe I Had An Impact On Them." I Don't Think I Did. I Don't Think I Ever Was That Well Known, To Have An Impact. And I Haven't Seen Comics That I Go, "oh, Yes! That Person Is Terribly Unprepared, With Their Notebook, And Going Off On 50 Tangents. There You Are. That's Me."

Unfortunately, I Am Not One Of Those Comics Where It's Guaranteed That I Hit It Out Of The Park Every Time. You Know, I Am Not Completely Reliable. It's Always Different, And It's A Complete Crapshoot Whether I'm Going To Do Well.

For My Stand-up, I Always Have My Notebook With Me And If Something Strikes Me, I'll Write It Down.