Nostradamus, Who Predicted That Billy Bailey Would

Amelia Earhart, Who Said, Stop Looking For Me; See If You Can Find My Luggage! Never Got A Dinner!

Steven Spielberg's Mother, Who Said To E.t., I Don't Care Where You're From, You're Here And You're Gonna Get Bar Mitzvahed! Never Got A Dinner!

Sure, I've Gotten Old. I've Had Two Bypass Surgeries, A Hip Replacement, New Knees... I've Fought Prostate Cancer And Diabetes. I'm Half Blind, Can't Hear Anything Quieter Than A Jet Engine, And Take 40 Different Medications That Make Me Dizzy, Winded, And Subject To Blackouts. I Have Bouts With Dementia, Poor Circulation, Hardly Feel My Hands Or Feet Anymore, Can't Remember If I'm 85 Or 92, But... Thank God, I Still Have My Florida Driver's License!

Donald Trump's Mother, Who Said, Donnie! Stop Playing Monopoly And Get In That Barber's Chair! Never Got A Dinner!

The Puerto Rican Doctor, Who Wrote All His Prescriptions With Spray Paint. Never Got A Dinner!