Non-combatant, N. A Dead Quaker.

If You Want To Read A Perfect Book There Is Only One Way: Write It.

Understanding, N. A Cerebral Secretion That Enables One Having It To Know A House From A Horse By The Roof On The House. Its Nature And Laws Have Been Exhaustively Expounded By Locke, Who Rode A House, And Kant, Who Lived In A Horse.

Pie, N. An Advance Agent Of The Reaper Whose Name Is Indigestion.

Christian - One Who Follows The Teachings Of Christ Insofar As They Are Not Inconsistent With A Life Of Sin.

Backbite: To ''speak Of A Man As You Find Him'' When He Can't Find You.