No One Is Perfect, Except For Penélope

Procrastination Is Not The Problem. It Is The Solution. Procrastinate Now, Don’t Put It Off.

I Was Raised In An Atmosphere Of 'everything's Fine.' But As I Got Older, I Was Like, 'well No, Everything's Not Fine. There Is Stuff That's Sad.' I Am A Really Sensitive Person. I Think I Am Too Sensitive Sometimes.

You Can Always Tell When The Relationship Is Over. Little Things Start Getting On Your Nerves, 'would You Please Stop That! That Breathing In And Out, It's So Repetitious.'

Most Comedy Is Based On Getting A Laugh At Somebody Else's Expense. And I Find That That's Just A Form Of Bullying In A Major Way. So I Want To Be An Example That You Can Be Funny And Be Kind, And Make People Laugh Without Hurting Somebody Else's Feelings.

Answers To Frequently Asked Questions: Yes. Yes. No. One Time In High School. Three Times In My Twenties. Rocks No Salt. Yes. Four. Never. And How Dare You! I Will Take No Further Questions.