Never Get Involved With Someone Who Wants

When I Was Young, I Wanted To Find The Great Dark Man. When I Said That I Realise Now That People Thought That By 'dark' I Meant Black, And That By 'great' I Meant Big. Whereas I Only Meant A Strong, Mysterious Person; Someone Who Would 'take Me Away From All This.'

One Should Always Be Wary Of Anyone Who Promises That Their Love Will Last Longer Than A Weekend.

One Of The Special Beauties Of America Is That It Is The Only Country In The World Where You Are Not Advised To Learn The Language Before Entering. Before I Ever Set Out For The United States, I Asked A Friend If I Should Study American. His Answer Was Unequivocal. "on No Account," He Said. "the More English You Sound, The More Likely You Are To Be Believed."

My Function In Life Was To Render Clear What Was Already Blindingly Conspicuous.

Of Course I Lie To People. But I Lie Altruistically - For Our Mutual Good. The Lie Is The Basic Building Block Of Good Manners. That May Seem Mildly Shocking To A Moralist - But Then What Isn't?