My Father Used To Brag That I

I Don't Make It In Regular Channels, And That's Okay For Me.

I Never Thought I Was Finished When People Said I Was Finished, Or Any Of That Stuff. I Always Had This Undying Belief That Even If I Was In A Wheelchair And I Could Only Move My Finger, Somehow I Would Become The Guy Who Does The Amazing Thing With His Finger.

I Have Spiritual Beliefs That I Could Literally Go Out And Make An Entire Comedy Routine About, And Tour As Some Sort Of Spiritual Guru, But It Kind Of Goes Against That [as] I Actually Believe The Things, So I'm Always Kind Of Caught In The Middle.

My Report Card Always Said, 'jim Finishes First And Then Disrupts The Other Students'.

I Don't Feel Any Pressure To Be Funny At All. I'm Funny Because I Want To Be Funny. I Could Sit Here And Be Serious For An Hour And You Would Go Away And Make Me Much Funnier Than I Am.