John Kerry Reportedly Flew In His Private

Howard Dean Announced Today He Will Campaign In Seven States. The States Are Rage, Frenzy, Fury, Rath, Fever, Agitation, And Delirium. Yeeeeaaaah!

A Woman In Great Britain Has Died After Being Hit In The Back Of The Head By A Golf Ball, On The First Hole. Her Husband Was So Distraught, He Only Played The Front Nine.

They Say Hot Dogs Can Kill You. How Do You Know It's Not The Bun?

For The First Time Ever, Women Are Scoring Higher Than Men On Iq Tests. Scientists Say It Has Something To Do With Breast Implants -- Not That It Makes The Women Smarter, It Just Makes The Men Dumber.

In A Speech Earlier Today President Bush Said If Iraq Gets Rid Of Saddam Hussein, He Will Help The Iraqi People With Food, Medicine, Supplies, Housing, Education - Anything That's Needed. Isn't That Amazing? He Finally Comes Up With A Domestic Agenda - And It's For Iraq. Maybe We Could Bring That Here If It Works Out.