John Kerry Reportedly Flew In His Private

President Obama And House Speaker John Boehner Have Agreed To Play A Round Of Golf Together. Imagine The Two Of Them At The End Of That Golf Game? Boehner Will Be Crying Over His Score And Obama Will Be Giving Three Explanations As To Why His Score Is Actually Better Than It Appears.

Well, All Across The Country, This Is Kind Of Sad, Unemployment Offices Are Swamped With People Waiting To File For Unemployment Insurance. It's Gotten So Bad That The Offices Are Overwhelmed And Can't Function. I Got An Idea. Why Don't You Hire More People? They're Right There In Line. Speed This Whole Thing Up!

Geraldo Has Returned To The States. See? I Told You Airline Security Was A Joke.

Anyway, A Spokesman For Barack Obama Says The Prisoners That Are Released From Guantanamo Will Either Be Sent Back To Their Home Countries Or Enter The New York City Cab Driver Training Program.

A New Poll Shows That Americans Now Believe That Bill Clinton Is More Honest Than President Bush. At Least When Clinton Screwed The Nation, He Did It One Person At A Time.