Jas, You Are Three Hundred Miles Away.

He Came Over And Ruffled My Hair, Which Is Technically Assault. I Could Get On The Blower To Childline.

And The Kittykats Would Have To Erect Scaffolding And A Pulley To Get Him Down. Mind You, I Wouldn't Put That Past Them. Sometimes When They Are Behind The Sofa Supposedly Purring, I Think They Are Drilling.

Some Things In Life Are Not Pleasant But They Have To Be Done. For Instance, German And Maths.

And A Secret Inward Voice In My Head Was Saying (in A Strange Breathy Voice...) Yes, Yessss, I Will Pop Round To The Blind Pig. I Will 'pop' Round Because Guess Who Lives At The Blind Pig? It Is Not A Blind Pig, It Is Alex.

I'm Not A Ice Cream, I'm A Human Being