It's Hard To Get Laughs When You're

Some People Work With A Trainer, Some People Work With A Stylist. I Work With A Celebrity Fecalist. A Fecalist Is Basically A Person Who Comes And Collects My Stools, And Then Examines Them To See If I'm Eating Right And If I Should Be Drinking More Water And What My Moods Should Be.

The First Time I Went To See A Second City Show, I Was In Awe Of Everything. I Just Wanted To Touch The Same Stage That Gilda Radner Had Walked On. It Was Sacred Ground.

Growing Up As A Girl Is Always Traumatizing, Especially When You Have The Deadly Combination Of Greasy Skin And Getting Your Boobs At Ten. But I Think It's Good To Grow Up That Way. It Builds Character.

It Is Less Dangerous To Draw A Cartoon Of Allah French-kissing Uncle Sam — Which, Let Me Make It Very Clear, I Have Not Done — Than It Is To Speak Honestly About [working Moms].

I Think Women Dress For Other Women To Let Them Know What Their Deal Is. Because If Women Were Only Dressing For Men, There Would Be Nothing But Victoria's Secret. There Would Be No Dior.