In The History Of Life, No Good

I'm Not Smart Enough To Write About Something That Didn't Actually Happen To Me. But I Couldn't Write A Space Movie If You Put A Gun To My Head.

Middle Names Are Kind Of Like Vice Presidents: It's A Fine Distinction And Certainly An Honor, But You're Never Not Aware That Someone Else Got The Real Job.

The Best Part Of Being Married Is... You Don't Have To Explain A Lot Of Things. Those Wordless Moments When You Both Know That What You Witnessed Together Is Funny, Idiotic, Or Really Sweet. Being Connected Is Pretty Miraculous.

But At The Same Time That The Experience Is Pulling You Apart, It's Also Bonding You. You Have This Joint Venture! You Both Made This Baby. And That's The Thing I Still Can't Get Over

Parents Often Give Middle Names Just So That Later, When They're Yelling At The Kid, They Can Drag It Out. Henry David Thoreau, You Come In Here This Instant!