In Other Words, It Was A Struggle

At Least You Know Where You Are With Blood. At Least Other People Can See It.

But I Saw The Pain And Sadness In Everything, And Swirled It Round My Mouth Like A Fine Wine.

Let Me Tell You Something: When You Dance, You Are The Greatest Dancer Who Has Ever Lived. And When You Sing, You Will Have The Courage To Raise Your Voice To The Heavens, Knowing That You May Never Get An Answer.

A Lot Of The Time In My Recurring Dreams, Before I Was Diagnosed, Iconic People Would Either Be Good Or Evil Figures. I Remember Dreaming Really Basic Stuff Like Trying To Navigate The London Underground, But Then Paul Newman Would Be The Only One Who Would Direct Me To The Right Trains. And I'm Trying To Remember Who Would Direct Me To The Wrong Ones.

There Is That Doll Dress-up Quality Of Adorable Teenage Girl Writer, And I Never Felt Either As Adorable As I Was Supposed To Be, Or As Dark As The Rumors, You Know, "she Must Have Slept With The Editor," And I Was Like, "oh My God, I'm Still A Virgin." It Was Very Strange.