In New York, There Are So Many

I Feel Like I'm Being Too Zen. I'm Inhaling Too Much Patchouli And Incense. It's Embarrassing.

The Pipeline Would Run From Canada To The Gulf Coast. It'll Be The Biggest Underground Structure Leading Into The U.s. Then People In Mexico Said, 'eh . . . Second Biggest.'

During A Recent Press Conference, Former President Jimmy Carter Said He Could Never Run For President Today Because He Doesn't Have A Lot Of Money. Well, That And The Fact That He's The Famously Bad President Jimmy Carter.

In A Recent Interview, Jeb Bush Revealed That His Brother George Gave Him The Nickname 'tortoise' Because He's Making Slow, Steady Progress. Though I Think The Bigger Story Here Is That Compared To George, Jeb Is The Slow One.

The Bp President Said Yesterday That The Company Would Survive. That's Like Someone Running Over Your Dog And Saying, 'don't Worry, My Car Is Fine.'