I'm Still Pretty Self-centered, Greedy And Angry.

I Didn't Raise My Kids With The Fear Of God.

I Went To School With Steven Wright Who Was The Shyest Guy I Knew, And One Day Someone Suddenly Told Me That He Was In A Club Doing Standup Comedy. I Went Down To His Club And He Was Great. Another Friend Of Mine, Who Was Pretty Much A Thief By Trade, Was Hosting The Show. So I Thought If These Guys Can Do It Then So Can I.

People Saying, 'life Didn't Turn Out The Way I Wanted It To.' Welcome To The Club. I Wanted To Be The Starting Center-fielder For The Boston Red Sox, For Chrissakes!

I Always Hated The Grateful Dead. Never Even Bought A Led Zeppelin Album.

He [ Campbell Scott ] Is Also A Really Funny Guy Which Not A Lot Of People Know.