I'm A Vagabond. I Have A Suitcase

It's Easy To Get Laid When You're Rich And Famous. When You're Broke And Unknown, It Takes Skill.

I'd Love To Be A Pop Idol. Of Course, My Groupies Are Now Between 40 And 50.

My Kids Don't Watch My Movies. What I Want To Do Is Go Home And Hug My Kids, Talk To Them And Engage With Them.

They Took 3-d Digital Photographs Of My Entire Body. I Had To Pose Stark Naked, Assuming A Kind Of Spider-man Position. After A Minute, One Of The Technicians Pointed To My Genitals And Said, Um, We're Not Getting Enough Data There ... It Wasn't What You Think. It Turns Out That The Fancy Digital Camera Doesn't Pick Up Dark Areas Too Well, And They Were Having Trouble Because Of The Hair Down There. I Actually Had To Spray On This Highlighter Stuff. (on Having Digital Photos Taken For The Invisible Man Role In The Film Hollow Man)

I Think There Is A Puritanical Wind That Is Blowing. I Have Never Seen Such A Lack Of Separation Between Church And State In America, I Don’t Believe In God, But If I Did I Would Say That Sex Is A Godgiven Right. Otherwise It’s The End Of Our Species.