I'm A Pessimist By Nature. A Pot

The Plain Fact Is: Religion Must Die For Mankind To Live.

It Is Appalling To Make Jesus Out Of Food! Now, If You’ll Excuse Me, I Have To Go Bake Some Communion Wafers.

I Was Watching Ashlee Simpson On Jay's Show Last Night... She Was Really Singing, And I Was Saying, 'bring Back The Lip Synch'... And It Struck Me That Ashlee Simpson Is A Lot Like George Bush - Because She Wouldn't Even Really Be In The Big Leagues If It Wasn't For Family Connections, And She's In Way Over Her Head. And She Doesn't Know What To Do. And She Blamed Her Band.

The Nypd Must Stop Acting Like The Only Thing Black People Do Is Run From Them And Shoot At Them. Believe It Or Not There Are Some Black New Yorkers Who Won't Run And Can't Shoot -- They're Called The #‎ Knicks .

A New Biography Of Madonna Came Out Last Week, And Apparently The Biography Lists All The Men She's Slept With. The Book Is Apparently Called The Manhattan Telephone Directory.