I'm A Panicked Karaoke Participant Because I

I'm A Panicked Karaoke Participant Because I Am Always Searching For A Song In The Moment. I Don't Have My Go To Song. I Will Be Driving Along And I Will Be Like, "that Should Be My Karaoke Song!" And Then I Forget What Song It Is.

I've Always Wanted To Sail Around The World In A Handmade Boat And I Built A Boat.

I Always Just Forced Myself To Do Crazy Things In Public. In College I Would Push An Overhead Projector Across Campus With My Pants Just Low Enough To Show My Butt. Then My Friend Would Incite The Crowd To Be Like, 'look At That Idiot!' That's How I Got Over Being Shy.

I Hate When New Parents Ask Who The Baby Looks Like. It Was Born 15 Minutes Ago, It Looks Like A Potato

When You Look At Someone Like Sacha Baron Cohen, You Have To Really Respect The Boundaries He Is Pushing As Bruno Or Borat.