If You Hit A Midget On The

I Really Had To Imagine The Kind Of Person That I Would Have Been If I Had Never Left My Hometown... I Don't Think I Would Have Been A Very Pleasant Person.

Beyond Any Role That I Ever Had, Really Early On As A Stand-up, I Would See Actors Decide To Try It And They Would Bomb Miserably. What I Realized Was That Stand-up, Acting And Writing Are All Their Own Disciplines.

Meal Isn't Over When I'm Full. Meal's Over When I Hate Myself.

I Remember, When 9/11 Went Down, My Reaction Was, 'well, I've Had It With Humanity.' But I Was Wrong.

Knock On Wood, My Groupies Tend To Be Very Artistic, Creative People - Sometimes Way More Creative Than I Am.