If It's Called The Usa Today, Why

There Once Was A Man Name Barack, Whose Re-election Came As A Shock. He Raised The Taxes I Pay, And Then Turned Marriage Gay. And Now He's Coming After Your Glock.

I Don't Know A Lot About Politics. I Like Talking About Human Behavior. Politicians Are Funny To Me Because They Often Say One Thing And Behave A Different Way.

And When Those Bombs Went Off, There Were Runners Who, After Finishing A Marathon, Kept Running For Another Two Miles To The Hospital To Donate Blood. So, Here's What I Know - These Maniacs May Have Tried To Make Life Bad For The People Of Boston, But All They Can Ever Do, Is Show Just How Good Those People Are.

Tv's Tony Snow Becomes The White House Press Secretary. How Will He Make The Difficult Transition From Fox News Reporter To Republican Apologist? ... Mr. President, It Is Time To Hire The Folks Who've Never Let You Down. Limbaugh At Health And Human Services. Hannity At State. Then Give Rummy The Medal Of Freedom And Install Bill O'reilly As Secretary Of Defense. Only Problem, You Might Find Yourself Invading Vermont. And I'll Replace Chertoff At Homeland Security. The Man's Done Nothing To Control The Bear Population.

The Beauty Of New Media Is That No Evidence Is Necessary. The Brave Blog-troopers Have Stormed The Cockpit Of News, And Wrestled The Joystick Of Authority Away From The Seasoned Pilots Of The Press Who Would Land Our Country At The Facts International Airport.