If I Behave As Though This Is

Just Because Of That One Disastrous Blind Date She Had Last Year, Where The Guy Turned Out To Be Fifty-nine, Not Thirty-nine (he Claimed It Was A Typo. Yeah, I’m Sure His Finger Just Happened To Slip Two Spaces To The Left).

Oh, This Shouldn't Be Allowed. There Should Be A Rule Which Says That People You've Met In The Gym Should Never Meet You In Real Life.

When I'm On A Break From Writing, I'll Log On To Amazon And Ebay. The Doorbell Is Constantly Being Rung By Deliverymen.

And We Spend The Rest Of The Evening Getting Very Pissed And Eating Ice Cream, As We Always Do When Something Good Or Bad Happens To Either One Of Us.

So I Buy It. The Most Perfect Little Cardigan In The World. People Will Call Me The Girl In The Gray Cardigan. I’ll Be Able To Live In It. Really, It’s An Investment.